Hurt..

Jay added Kaycee to FB tonight. While I know he says he doesn't care about her, I don't understand why he needs to even acknowledge her. I swear if I have done all this for him and he does something stupid... I dont know what would happen. Ughh I wish I had someone to vent to.

CD22-4DPO

So FF changed my O-day to the 18th. Not sure how I feel about that. So I was planning to test the 3rd and there would be no point now since my AF will be 2 days later. Ughh.  IDK. Chart and PM attached.

Reading from Cheri22

"They are showing me a girl and they relate her to NOVEMBER so this is either birth month, conceive month or the month you find out in

They are they showing me a girl who is always going to want to do things according to plan. Shes always going to be highly organized and often knowing what is going to be happening and how things need to be taken care of. I am seeing her as someone who is always going to be good about getting others involved and then getting things completed on time. Its one of her biggest pet peeves is when things are not working out. You will find her to always have this really big clip board that she has with all of the information about what shes doing, what needs to happen and how things should be taken care of. Making her own little check list and trying to ensure that everything is going according to plan.

They are showing her having a little younger brother and shes often telling him what to do too.. For the most part, he humors her, is always going to try and do it the way she wants, but after shes no longer paying attention hes quick to do it his way and how he would like it to look.

Shes always going to have her hair just past her shoulders, but I am seeing her more times than not, putting it up into a pony tail and away from her face. Shes about making sure that its efficient more than anything and not so time consuming.

When to comes to marriage i am seeing her closer to 23. They will have two boys of their own.

When to comes to career paths, they are showing her linked to working in real estate"

CD19-3DPO

Decided to put my effed up temp in from CD17 because my chart looked stupid without it. So officially 3DPO and that should be reflected tomorrow.  Today is the day I'm suppose to get my reading from Cheri22. I hope I get it before bed so I won't be up all night wondering. Reread my reading from Amber and saw she said mid-May delivery.  If it by some miracle happens this cycle my EDD is May 14th. Maybe a little hope left. We will see.  Chart attached.

Cd17

Positive OPK'S continue. Jay was in a bad mood because his football team lost last night so he wasnt interested in BD'ING sadly :-( hopefully the bd'ing 3 days before helps *sigh* Major cramps on my right side right now. Probably ovulation.  Discarded my temp this morning. Stupidly got up and peed then took it. Oh well. Opks(7am and 6:00pm) and chart below.

CD16

Positive OPK this evening :) Ovulation happening soon ! Hoping beyond hope like usual that this month will be it. Still planning to do a progesterone test in a week. Hopefully I'll be able to and that will at least verify I am in fact ovulating. Here's the OPK and my chart thus far.

CD11

Here is today's chart and my OPK from 11:30. Woke up 30 mins later so temp was off.
I keep having dreams about people telling me I'm not going to get pregnant.  Hopefully its just my subconscious and it turns out to be the opposite soon.
Jay and I have been on the outs for a while. As much as I want to get pregnant I'm not sure if I should. I don't know where our relationship is going at this point.

CD9

Today's OPK is SO much lighter than the one about 24 hours ago. I think it might just be because I drank a lot of water today and peed a LOT. Oh well. Here are todays chart and OPK from about 6:45PM

CD8

No real update. Just going with the flow. Here are todays OPKS.

 8AM

7PM

CD7 (10th cycle)

Having a really weird cycle thus far. 4 days of AF and 3 days of spotting.  Temping vaginally this cycle. Already have a line on my OPK.
Chart and OPK pic attached. 

Well it's CD4 again... *sigh*

I haven't had the heart to update. I'm pretty devastated. Especially considering I decided to give in and get a conception reading and even paid instead of waiting for a free one. This was my reading:
Hello Ashley,

 I started looking at the cards and they were all pointing to you finding out you're pregnant within the next 2 weeks... When was your last AF? I also feel that you will be having a girl.  Delivery method will be vaginal delivery that lasts 13 hours. I do not see any problems with your pregnancy OR delivery. I feel you will be delivering mid May and it will be a VERY rainy day! Your daughter will be healthy and require no medical assistance after birth. You will have some heavy bleeding from what I am feeling but they will be able to get that under control within a few minutes. Just take it easy and remember to take your folic acid! 

Please let me know if you need/want clarification on anything. 

Thank you!

-Amber

AF showed later that day.

I don't know what to do anymore. I'm depressed and feel like I don't know if I can do this anymore. 

CD24-8DPO

Woke up to orange stained sticky CM this morning. Don't know what to think about it so I just put spotting. I'm pretty sure I'm out this month. My temps look terrible. Only time will tell. Pic of CM, chart and PM attached.

CD21-5DPO

Been slacking on the updates. Work has been so busy and exhausting. Just about half way through the 2WW and I haven't even noticed. Wow. Chart and PM posted below. Fx for this cycle :-)

FYI:

Just noticed my test date is A's birthday. Maybe he will be my good luck charm to bring a cousin into the world for him ♥